• The 10 most annoying series - part 3: weaning
  • Author avatar
    Amelia Slocombe
  • annoyingbabiesbabyblogchildreneatingfunfunnygrowing upmotherhoodparentingpregnancyrelationshipsteethingtoddlerstop tentruthweaningwoman

The 10 most annoying series - part 3: weaning

Rock of Feather teething jewellery blogOver the next few weeks, the RoF blog will be covering the "ten most annoying things" relating to a whole variety of issues we have to experience as parents. From sleeping to teething, from potty training to weaning, we will be reminding you why it's such bloody hard work bringing up a child.

So, here is part 3, our 10 most annoying things to do with WEANING:

1) It takes bloody ages. Think of weaning as a marathon, not a sprint. Actually, sod that, think of it as one of those ridiculous contests where you aim to do 50 marathons across 50 countries in 50 days. And then multiply that by three. That's how long it takes to successfully wean a child on to the same food as you.

2) When you start the process, you will realise how much easier it was when your child lived exclusively off milk. Because weaning doesn't actually mean they will consume anything at all to begin with. Meaning that, in the early days, you will spend pretty much your entire day either giving them milk, cooking and blending vegetables, feeding them puree or giving them random food items for them to stick in their mouths and play with (but not eat).

3) Even after all these years, there is no agreement when it comes to how best to wean a baby. Some say it's all about baby led. Others say puree is quicker and safer. Does it make a blind bit of difference which method you choose? As long as you're not the mum who feeds their offspring puréed McDonalds' cheeseburgers, probably not, but by God, do mums like to talk about it.

4) It is pretty much guaranteed that your baby will refuse all types of vegetable at meal time, but happily eat a dehydrated old pea off the floor. Which they will usually make a point of finding and eating at the exact moment your health visitor pops in to check on your progress.

5) The food your baby loves on a Tuesday will be refused on a Wednesday.

6) However hard you try, your baby will always find a way to fling the contents of their feeding bowl off their highchair and around the room the second you take your eye off the ball. In fact, the only place the food won't go is in their mouths. Expect your kitchen to look like a crime scene after every meal time. Especially if you've used a tomato based sauce.

7) Your concerted efforts to keep sugar away from your baby will be throughly ruined by grandparents. They will give them biscuits, cake and scoops of ice cream with reckless abandon. And adult sized portions at that. And they will then look at you innocently when you tell them your child was sick all over your lounge carpet the minute you got them home.

8) Your child will eat everything for everyone apart from you. Your mother in law will report how your child adores her home made spinach stew. Nursery will tell you how they devour a Thai green curry. Yet for some reason your child looks at your food offerings in the same way as you would if a bird shat on your lunch.

9) Restaurants will no longer be tranquil havens where you can go and enjoy a peaceful lunch with a friend whilst your baby has an afternoon nap in the pram. From now on, you will spend the first hour trying to convince your child not to dump the contents of their lunch on the floor. You will then devote the second hour picking up the contents of their lunch off the floor.

10) If you thought baby poo smelt bad before, just wait until you introduce solids. You have been warned.

Do you have a teething baby or toddler? Visit our site www.rockoffeather.com and purchase some of our utterly delectable (and fashionable) silicone jewellery. Perfect for your little teethers.
  • Author avatar
    Amelia Slocombe
  • annoyingbabiesbabyblogchildreneatingfunfunnygrowing upmotherhoodparentingpregnancyrelationshipsteethingtoddlerstop tentruthweaningwoman

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